Marriage staying power.

As we enter the wedding season I think about the excitement that follows the bride and the joy that we glean from helping them to make their dreams come true.  I would like to be able to say that it is always joyful, but sometimes it is just not.  There are things that I see that steal that joy.

One observation that I have had over the decades of brides is that it is often easy to tell which bride will have staying power in her marriage and which will not.  If their focus is on the important thing:  They will be married to their best friend for the rest of their life:  it's gonna last.  If their focus is on this bead and that thread and things that do not truly make or break the happiness of the day:  chances are it's not going to last.  If they are lovely to deal with, I assume that is the normal course of their life.  Their marriage will last.  If they are ugly to deal with, I assume that is the normal course of their life.  Their marriage is likely not to last and will be ugly while it does.

Over the years I have had the privilege to meet many women celebrating their 25th, 50th and even 75th anniversaries.  They all had a common thread to the staying power of their marriage.  One was that they kept their mates first.  Another was didn't sweat the little stuff.  Also they were careful in their choices for their battles.  Some had loving quips for how they dealt with problems in their marriage.  It always warms my heart and often brings a tear to my eye when I am allowed to share their experiences and the beauty love has brought to their lives.

My great grandmother Rose was one such woman.  Her husband fell in love with her when she was a young teen, too young to marry.  George, my great grandfather, spent the next four years in a utter labor of love and hand built an amazing mansion for the love of his life.  He brought her home at 16 and they shared 81 years of marriage.  On occasion I was privileged to stay with great grandma Rose in her amazing house with the grand piano in the foyer.  My love of piano music grew as I sat on the window sill on the landing of the beautiful winding stairs.  Grandpa had a wood shop in the garage and spent many hours tinkering there. Grandma cared for the house and spent lots of time at the church and playing bingo.  I never saw or felt any distention in that house:  only peace and love.  The laundry shoot that spanned three floors was loads of fun to send things down.  I'm sure grandma was a little irritated by this mischief, but she never let it show.  I was very tiny as a child and remember being allowed to ride the dumb waiter to the basement.  Grandma and Grandpa had a lovely garden with little paths that filled their yard.  What fun was had there!

Why did the marriage last?  Probably because they both had hearts filled with God and love. Because they had harmony in their home.  Because they cared well for each other.  Maybe because great grandma always allowed her husband to be the head of the household.  She was the good strong neck that kept that head turned in the right direction.

So as we enter this new season of brides I will likely impart some little wisdom in hopes that they too will have a marriage like my great grandparents did.

This photo is of John and Ann Betar:  Click on the link to see their story.

Couple Celebrates 80th Wedding Anniversary, Shares Secrets to Lasting Marriage

Merry Christmas to one and all.

The value of the product.

With a tough economy presiding over us we have seen an increasing trend towards buying online.  When a client starts their shopping adventure it often begins on line.  Of course a savvy client will have researched things before she heads out shopping.  In that research she will no doubt discover a myriad of choices displayed on lovely websites.  Over the past few years there has been an increasing trend copycat dresses.  Of course this has always existed, but the prevalence has risen with the internet and the global market place easily accessible.

As we plan our event we imagine that the dresses that the supplier is offering will be exactly like the picture.  The picture created by a reputable designer:  their personal creation of artwork.  When that photo is seen and then the product the quality and workmanship becomes apparent.  The copycat gown will not be the same as the original design.  When your copycat gown arrives you will find that, nearly without exception, the cut, the fabric, the construction, the embellishments ...everything will be different than the original.  Should you hang the two gowns side by side you will find that they are different on nearly every level:  not even comparable 

Over the last several years increasing numbers of clients have arrived at our salon in distress over an on line order that had gone badly.  It could happen that you get a gown that is satisfactory and you are happy, but there are greater chances for disappointment in the end.  These clients have already spent good money on a gown that is either poorly constructed, ill fit, or can not even be made to work for their event.  The problem is that the price was so alluring.  The prices are often listed on line for far less than the reputable designer is willing or even capable of producing their garments.  This client now finds herself having a lot of stress and is often near desperation because she now has no time to order from the reputable manufacturer.  The reputable manufacturer will take any where from 16 - 32 weeks to produce your quality garment.  The china factory will offer you your product in 3 weeks.  Perhaps that should be one of the first red flags.

She now finds herself having to make her second choice as the first one simply is not available in her time frame.  Or she will need to order on a rush, which drives the costs up as well.

There have been countless law suits for infringement on the works of art that these designers create:

American Bridal & Prom Industry Association, Inc. , Mon Cheri Bridals, LLC , Promgirl, Inc. , Maggie Sottero Designs, LLC , La Femme Boutique, Inc. , Bari-Jay Fashions, Inc. , Alyce Designs, Inc. , Allure Bridals, Inc. , Watters Designs, Inc. , Next Century Productions, Inc. , Mori Lee, LLC , Emme Bridal, Inc. , Simone Cavalli Corp. , Bonny MT Enterprises Co., Ltd. , Casablanca Bridals, Inc. , Impression Bridal, Inc. , Formosa Sunrise LLC , Essense of Australia, Inc., Edward Berger, Inc. , Jovani Fashion Ltd. , Lizzette Brodsky , Frank Disantis, Precious Formals, Inc. , Countess Corporation, Jordan Fashions Corp, Eve of Mi Lady have all been litigants just to name a few. 

What?!?!? I hear you say.  Yes, over the last twenty years the designers of formal gowns have worked very hard to protect their creations.  They are now deemed as works of art.  It is not uncommon for a designer to spend an entire month creating a creation.  She might spend even longer in the actual production of the creation.  Much time and effort goes into the creation of a gown.  Some designers design every aspect of their gowns, the fabric, the lace, the beadwork:  every little detail has involved thought, development and creation.  Yet a desperate Chinese factory might bang out a cheap imitation of the gown and in the neglect of the intimate details create something that is vastly different than the original gown which they are advertising to be offering.

Many reputable designers do not allow their gowns to be made available on the internet.  They protect their works of art and creations valiantly.  They recognize that the product must be seen, touched, tried on to fully appreciate it.  There was a time when artists of this type were respected and appreciated for the great efforts that they took.  Unfortunately today's client tends to have been raised in this hot and now: more for cheap, cheap, cheap society.  So the belief has developed that the product has little to no value in spite of the tremendous efforts that are involved in creation.  I seldom hear a client exclaim:  Oh my goodness!  That must have taken months to make that!!  And indeed it did.  No, we no longer hear that sort of appreciation.  What we do hear on a regular basis is that "the cost of a gown is ridiculous!"   I mean after all, it is only going to be worn for one day.  As an artist this is very demeaning and depressing to experience.  After all, the money is not what anyone would define as great, so clearly the efforts are acts of love.

So you know the old saying:  "If it's too good to be true:  it probably isn't true."  While you may only wear this gown for one day:  you will have a life time of memories to accompany you.

Top 10 Wedding Trends for 2012

1.     Creative Table Tops.

2.     Water Color Bridal Fashions.

3.     Ranch Venues:  Rustic Barns.

4.     Brides covering up with sleeves or jackets

5.     Floral Textures.

6.     Detailed Cakes:  Hand beaded or designed.

7.     Natural, panoramic photography.

8.     Poking fun at the wedding planning process.

9.      Super sized honeymoons.

10.  Charitable Registries.

Are you compelled to keep up with trends or are you the kind of girl who is most comfortable displaying your own personal and unique style?  Weddings are a individual and intimate occasion which should reflect the couple's personalities and tastes.  

Creative table tops are definitely in vogue.  We are seeing such an array of personalized choices that it would be difficult to actually have only one personal favorite.

We have noticed that the purple/plum/amethyst shades are extremely popular this year.  We have seen a lot of popping colors with strong contrasts.  For the more subdued and elegant bride water colors have been the trend.  

With the costs of church rental, the minister, accouterments to decorate the church rising we are seeing a strong trend towards one venue weddings where the wedding and reception are in the same location and even in the same space.  Barn, Ranch, at home and outdoors are all very popular with reception locations pushing $5000 for the rental fee.  

The strapless gown is still requested, but many are adding sleeves, straps or jackets to switch up the neckline.  We are having lots of fun 're-creating' to achieve that personalized look that each bride seeks.

Floral textures are amazing.  We are seeing everything from bright and bold with lots of color to subtle and subdued with only tonal variations.  It would be hard to find flowers that we don't like.  Peonies have been very popular as well as Gerber Daises.

Be certain to capture your wedding in the pictures for at the end of the day that is all that you will have left besides your groom, your gown and a lot of memories.

Have fun.  Poke fun at yourself and the entire process.  Remember:  the most important thing is that at the end of the day you two will be married.

Many are taking extravagant honeymoons and are assisted in the process by using the popular honeymoon registries where your guests can gift parts of your honeymoon.

Be charitable.  It is the right thing to do.  A better world starts with each of us deciding to be better people.  Take a deep breath and have fun with the process.

New Etsy Shop!

Looking for something that's truly one-of-a-kind?  Whether that's the perfect vintage gown or the perfect custom accessory, you've come to the right place!  Bella Sposa Bridal & Prom is proud to announce our brand-new Etsy shop!  Check back often for new unique accessories for weddings and Prom, jewelry, bridal party gifts, and gorgeous vintage gowns.

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Glove Love

Need that perfect finishing touch for Prom?  We have gloves in every color of the rainbow!

Also available - velvet, lace, sheer, metallic, etc.  

There are even more styles than just the ones pictured, so stop in and get the perfect pair to match your dress!

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Trend Watch 2012 - Wedding Colors

One of the first decisions you'll need to make when planning your wedding is the color palette.  Your bridesmaid gowns, invitations, reception decor, etc will all be determined by your color choices.  Let's explore some of the most popular color themes for 2012.

Charcoal

Charcoal is a nice, rich neutral which can easily be jazzed up with jewel tones or mellowed out with pastels.  It's an easy color for mothers of the bride and groom to coordinate with, as well.  Gray has also been a popular choice for men's tuxes.  

Purple

Purple is an incredibly regal color.  One of the nice things about it is that it's pretty, but not too girly.  Most purple hues are still manly enough that your guys won't mind wearing matching vests with their tuxes.  Green, Pink and Silver are good accent colors.  Variegated hues of purple can make the planning go very easily and result in a beautiful look.  

Orange

Orange has always been popular for fall weddings, and is perfectly paired with a rich chocolate brown or a deep, vibrant plum.  Autumn colors bring a feeling of abundance and prosperity to the festivities, and can make your wedding memorable and unconventional.  

Peacock

So many colors can be pulled from a peacock feather.  Sapphire, Indigo, Teal, Plum, Gold, Emerald, Jade, etc.  Jewel tones are at home here.  You could put each bridesmaid in a different color and give them each a feather in their hair, and they would all coordinate perfectly.

Blue

Blue has been making a comeback lately.  It's a highly versatile hue that looks good on just about everyone, and you'll have no trouble convincing your guys to wear blue vests with their tuxes.  Blue also coordinates well with almost every other color out there - think of your favorite pair of blue jeans that go with everything!  Also, your "something blue" can be a sash or hair adornment in the same color as the bridesmaid dresses, to give you that pop of color on the big day.

For more color ideas, --->  

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Welcome to Dress Heaven

Our Prom/Social Occasion gown selection is the largest in the area - we have over 2,500 dresses in stock.  There's something for everyone in "Dress Heaven," as our customers like to call it.  Come take a look and find your perfect gown for your special event.  Bring your date along and he can get his tux rental here, too.

Remember our exclusive guarantee:  we will never sell the same dress to anyone else at your school, ever.

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Did You Know? The Wedding Kiss

In ancient Rome, when marriage was more often for political or financial reasons than for love, the bride and groom would kiss because that was how Romans sealed a legal contract.

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Did You Know? "Traditional" Wedding Gown Colors

White and ivory are commonly understood to be the "traditional" colors for a young, virgin bride, while women getting married for the second time or later in life are "supposed to" wear something other than white.  In reality, any bride can choose any color for her special day.  Wearing white is really only a Western custom, and has only been popular for the last 170 years or so.  In colonial America, yellow was the most popular choice for wedding gowns.  In India, China, and Vietnam today, red is still considered traditional for brides, because it symbolizes good luck.

Red tulle bridal gown with silver metallic embroidery

White is actually a color of mourning in many parts of the world.  However, Queen Victoria wore a white bridal gown in 1840, and it has been the fad ever since.  White has also come to be associated with purity, although blue used to carry that meaning.  Of course, there are many folk sayings that have seeped into popular culture that have to do with weddings.  One such saying focused on color is the following:  

Married in White, you have chosen right, 

Married in Blue, your love will always be true, 

Married in Pearl, you will live in a whirl, 

Married in Brown, you’ll never live in town, 

Married in Red, you will wish yourself dead, 

Married in Yellow, ashamed of your fellow, 

Married in Green, ashamed to be seen, 

Married in Pink, your spirit will sink, 

Married in Grey, you will go far away, 

Married in Black, you will wish yourself back.

Café satin gown with ivory lace appliqués

Laura Ingalls Wilder was married in a black dress, as it happened to be her best dress at the time.  That's exactly what brides used to wear - their best dress.  Today the bridal gown has become its own entity, often the single most important purchase a woman will make for her wedding.  Modern brides don't always want to follow all of the "rules" of society's expectations, and search out new bridal colors such as silver, blush, champagne, gold, and blue, or go bold with red.  

Blush taffeta asymmetrical gown with beaded bodice

What you wear on your wedding should be up to you.  Your dress should make you feel comfortable, and most importantly, make you feel like you.  

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Happy Valentine's Day!

Did you ever wonder where we get the classic Valentine's Day rhyme "Roses are red, Violets are blue"?  It comes from Gammer Gurton's Garland, a collection of English nursery rhymes from 1784.

The rose is red, the violet's blue,
The honey's sweet, and so are you.
Thou art my love and I am thine;
I drew thee to my Valentine:
The lot was cast and then I drew,
And Fortune said it shou'd be you

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Let's Talk Necklines - Popular Styles

The neckline of your gown will frame your face.  It can be extravagant or simple, sexy or modest, and anywhere in between.  Today we'll cover the six most popular necklines for the modern bride.  There are many more varieties, which we will cover in subsequent posts.  Also, each neckline style has several variations.  Below are simple illustrations to give you the idea of each style - Strapless, Sweetheart, Tank, Halter, Inverted Halter, and One-Shoulder.

Let's start with Strapless.  This is the simplest neckline, and the name says it all - there are no straps.  Many girls have concerns about a Strapless gown staying up, but if the dress is fit correctly at the waist, this will not be a problem.  The weight of the dress should sit on your hip shelf, so even if you have straps, they don't really to keep the dress up.  However, most strapless bridal gowns and bridesmaids or prom dresses do come with optional spaghetti straps.  A typical strapless gown is just straight across over the bust.

A variation on Strapless is Sweetheart, which dips in at the middle.  It can be anything from a slight scoop to a plunging V, and it can also come with straps.  The Sweetheart is generally a very flattering style on most body types.

A dress with two straps built in to the structure of the bodice is called a Tank style.  This is different from adding straps to a Strapless or Sweetheart gown, as those would be made from a separate piece of material and added after the gown is constructed.  With a Tank style, the straps are an extension of the dress itself.  For comfort reasons, many women choose to wear a regular bra with a Tank style dress, as the straps are generally wider than spaghetti straps.

A similar look to the Tank is the Halter style.  Again, straps are built in when the dress is made, but here they meet around the back of the neck to form one strap.

Another version of the Halter is the Inverted Halter.  Here, instead of the neckline being open, the area between the two straps is filled in, bringing the neckline up to just under the neck.

The One-Shoulder style is pretty self-explanatory.  One shoulder has a strap, and the other does not.  This style has been very popular, especially with asymmetrical gowns.  One-shoulder gowns tend to have more embellishment on that shoulder than you will typically find on a Tank.  Because there is only one strap, it can be larger and fancier without overwhelming the girl wearing it.  Or there can be two or three spaghetti straps coming from one point on the front and fanning out in the back, for added interest.

Stay tuned for more necklines!  There are many more than these first six, and endless variations thereof.


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Did you know? Ring Finger Trivia

Ever wonder why the ring finger is considered the "ring finger"?  And why wedding and engagement rings are traditionally worn on the left hand?  Well, according to ancient Roman beliefs, a vein in the left ring finger led directly to the heart, since the heart is on the left side of the body.  How romantic!

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Let's Talk Skirts

The skirt of a formal gown really can have the biggest impact on the overall look and feel of the gown.  With so much material typically in the skirt, there is quite the opportunity to wow.  Having an understanding of the basic skirt shapes will help you better define what you're looking for when shopping for a formal gown - whether it be bridal, prom, mother or maid.


There are four basic skirt shapes, which define the overall silhouette of the gown - Sheath, Mermaid, A-Line, and Ballgown.  

This may seem like a limited selection, but once you start mixing and matching skirt styles with necklines, fabric types, sleeves, embellishments and styling - all of which will be covered in subsequent posts - the possibilities really are endless.

Sheath:  This is the slimmest skirt style, and fits very closely to the body.  Often a sheath skirt will have a slit to allow for movement when walking.

All-Over Lace Sheath

Mermaid:  Also known as Trumpet or Fit-and-Flare, this style hugs the body down past the hips, then flares out from around the knees. 

Beaded/Ruffle Organza Mermaid

A-Line:  This style is so named because it resembles the capital letter A.  The skirt fits close at the waist, and flares smoothly out to the hem, which can be quite full.

Tulle/Lace A-Line

Ballgown:  This is the fullest skirt style, although the degree of fullness varies with the amount and type of fabric.  The fabric of the skirt is gathered into the waist, so it flares out in all directions directly from the waist seam.  Tulle is a common fabric for ballgown skirts, and calls to mind a romantic ballerina tutu.  Satin and Taffeta are also often used for this type of skirt, and can evoke a fairy princess feeling.

            Leopard Metallic Net Prom Ballgown                         Tulle Bridal Ballgown

Next week we'll discuss necklines, so be sure to check back for more updates!  

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New Year - New Blog Series!

Here at Bella Sposa Bridal, we've noticed that many girls coming in to buy dresses have a hard time describing exactly what they're looking for.  The problem is, of course, not everyone has spent 30+ years working in the wedding industry, or has studied the history of clothing and fashion in a classroom setting, or has worked as a seamstress, like our staff has.  In an effort to remedy this, we will feature a series of blog posts on definitions of common sewing and fashion terms, which will run for the next several weeks.  We'll teach necklines, skirt styles, hem lengths, train lengths, veil styles and lengths, fabric types, and general style terms.

These posts will be conjuctive with our Glossary where we will also be creating images to clarify the definitions.

To begin with, here's a quick breakdown of sewing terms to help you interpret style descriptions in magazines and appear informed when you come in to look at gowns, or when you describe your perfect dress to your friends and family. 

Seam:  A joining of two pieces of fabric to construct a garment.  You can find the seams in whatever clothing you're wearing now to see how they're put together. 

Seam Allowance:  This refers to how much fabric is contained within the seam - in other words, the width of the edge of the fabric to the stitching (seam).  The seam allowance is hidden on the inside of the garment, and determines how much (if at all) the garment can be taken out, if it needs to be a larger size.  Seam allowance is measured in terms of inches; for instance - 1/4", 3/4", 5/8", etc. 

Hem:  The bottom of any garment is a hem, and the way the fabric is finished at the bottom can create a variety of effects.  These will be covered in further detail down the road.

Bodice:  This is the part of the dress that covers the torso - the bust to the waist.  The bodice can meet the skirt just under the bust - called an Empire waist; at the natural waist; or below - known as Drop Waist.

A Princess Cut gown does not have a separate bodice and skirt, but instead has vertical seams that run from top to bottom, to provide the dress shaping.

Lining:  Most formal gowns have more than one layer.  The inmost layer is called the dress lining.  Often this is constructed from a lightweight fabric to reduce bulk.  Keep in mind when you are having a dress altered that the changes made to your dress - sides in or out, hem shortened, lengthened, or reshaped - will also need to be done to the lining, and any additional layers between it and the dress itself.  This will be covered in greater detail when we discuss the cost of alterations.

Crinoline:  Full skirts in bridal, prom, and bridesmaids gowns almost always have a built-in crinoline, which is a gathered layer of stiff tulle or net that provides the "poof" of the gown.  We also rent out separate slips and crinolines if the built-in layer does not create the desired effect.

An example of a full crinoline slip

On the other hand, a built-in crinoline can also be removed if "poof" is not what you're looking for.  Built-in crinolines are another layer that often needs to be altered, especially when hems are shortened.  This can mean a great deal of extra work for the seamstress, as this layer is gathered - which means the overall length of material to be hemmed is greater - so expect to be charged accordingly at alterations time.

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